Helpfull Hints from the Desk of Coach Kenny Blowensme.
Keeping the rug
To make sure your hair replacement system stays intact (and fragrant), here are the best maintenance methods, according to David Hansen:
• Before securing to your scalp, thoroughly comb or brush your hairpiece. Use a wide-toothed comb with smooth, rounded edges to avoid abuse to the foundation. If brushing, use natural boar bristles.
• While wearing the hairpiece avoid prolonged sun exposure, which could lead to oxidation. Reddish highlights could appear or the color may lighten up to four shades.
• Do not sleep, swim or sweat excessively, which could critically shorten the toupee's lifespan (usually two to three years).
• At night, secure the hairpiece to a Styrofoam head with a few T-pins. That will help maintain shape.
• Have it professionally cleaned every two weeks. Never do it on your own, unless trained to do so. The tape, hair spray residue, scalp oils and perspiration are removed and the hairpiece's original fullness is restored. The entire procedure takes up to 30 minutes.
• Before securing to your scalp, thoroughly comb or brush your hairpiece. Use a wide-toothed comb with smooth, rounded edges to avoid abuse to the foundation. If brushing, use natural boar bristles.
• While wearing the hairpiece avoid prolonged sun exposure, which could lead to oxidation. Reddish highlights could appear or the color may lighten up to four shades.
• Do not sleep, swim or sweat excessively, which could critically shorten the toupee's lifespan (usually two to three years).
• At night, secure the hairpiece to a Styrofoam head with a few T-pins. That will help maintain shape.
• Have it professionally cleaned every two weeks. Never do it on your own, unless trained to do so. The tape, hair spray residue, scalp oils and perspiration are removed and the hairpiece's original fullness is restored. The entire procedure takes up to 30 minutes.
posted by PTT at 9:22 AM
8 Comments:
Why doesn't Owenswig just get a baseball cap and call it a day. He could buy a clip on pony tail, if he feels the need for hair on or around his melon.
I wonder if Owenswig developed a relationship with that styrofoamy head?
Here here Edgar!
I am surprised that no one has accidently defended the house and home by shooting one of these cowardly hand billers.
Coach Blowensme is the perfect creap to be creeping around the neighborhoods dropping off a hand bill here peaking into a few windows there....
He need not worry of being shot because any hedge row over five feet in height provides excellent cover for the Coach. He can walk upright with ease as he peddles his sleaze.
I have a huge no soliciting sign the front of my crib. I would say they have no repect from such a posting but it is more likely that they didn't have time to stop and sound out the words.
I have a new sign that reads,
"Coach Blowensme, there are no children inside here, please keep your crap to yourself and stay the f off my property."
He may scurry around without his hair thereby creating a fairly effective disguise. Be on the look out.
Ewwwwwwwww....I can just see that piggy eyed gopher....slithering around in the wee hours of the morning before dawn and spying into windows as he deposits the propaganda on peoples door steps.
Filthy bugger!!!!!!!
Can't wait to sit in the front row with my coonskin cap! Be cautious. I understand that our bewigged little scumbag sells guns and carries one,{Maybe it helps him feel bigger or more manly. Not!}
Be sure that he is actually on your property before you shoot.
I hope the school boards have more sense than to allow this sick and twisted character to have any contact with our children. If this should occur, I will certainly protest, as will many others.****
OK who hijacked SPYDOGs ID? Even though the rant is in his usual grammatical tense, he breaks lock step with her honor and states eveyone who fills ut a slip for citizens comments should be heard and should be alloted 5 minutes instead of three. Has the dog had a change of heart? Did he finally hear the pop of his head exiting hi ass? Has the ORT gotten around to stepping on his toes also? Or are my worst fears really real? Did anyone else see wierd lights in the sky over the Piss Pot Pete mansion last night. Has Spy dog been abducted by the aliens and replaced with a pod person? we could only hope...
Should we expect to see ORT prowlers in Ward 2 tonight or tomorrow night? They have hit Ward 4 and Ward 1 on consecutive days.
I can see Kennyboy sweating over the copiers at OfficeDepot, cursing every paperjam that keeps him from delivering his filth to the rest of Overland.
Its a different FBI. I believe Blowensme is referring to his FBI (Federation of Bald Idiots).
Damn, that's funny!
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